


Waiting on a Survivor

by MissNightTigress



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman (Movies - Nolan), Batman - All Media Types, DCU, Red Hood and the Outlaws, Under the Red Hood
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Intimacy, Love, M/M, Romance, relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-04
Updated: 2013-01-04
Packaged: 2017-11-23 14:59:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/623438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissNightTigress/pseuds/MissNightTigress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Many nights weren’t spent like this. If Dick and Jay weren’t slumping in and crashing hard after a mission, they were pounding each other into the mattress out of sheer thanks they were both alive and able to enjoy the moment. Rarely, they shared intimate moments like tracing scars or just sharing secrets about one another. Tonight was secret sharing, and that led to some tense moments for the couple...</p><p>Idea for this piece was created by a fic written by dicksfingerstripes on Tumblr, which can be found at:</p><p>http://dicksfingerstripes.tumblr.com/post/39185343795/as-chick-flick-as-well-get</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting on a Survivor

Many nights weren’t spent like this. If Dick and Jay weren’t slumping in and crashing hard after a mission, they were pounding each other into the mattress out of sheer thanks they were both alive and able to enjoy the moment. Rarely, they shared intimate moments like tracing scars or just sharing secrets about one another. Tonight was secret sharing.

One of Jason’s beefy arms was wound around Dick’s bare torso, his fingers circling the skin there in random patterns. His left hand was weaved in the older man’s wavy raven locks, scrunching it slowly and repetitively. “My favorite cereal was Fruity Pebbles. I hated my mother added milk, and often just ate them dry with my fingers.”

He could feel Dick’s face twist in mock disgust and a bit of humor. “Ew. You have no respect for cereal products whatsoever.”

Teal eyes rolled before the muscular arm around Dick’s torso gave a jostle. “Your turn, circus boy.”

Dick chucked and propped his head up, fingers skimming up Jay’s sides before they began mimicking Jason’s patterns on the Hood’s chest. “I’m secretly a sucker for country music. Brad Paisley is one of my favorite country artists. ‘Waiting on a Woman’ gets me every time.”

Jason wanted to snort at Dick’s sensitivity, but he kept it in, fingers scrunching his lover’s hair more. “Can I ask why?”

A heavy silence filled the room before Dick spoke again. “My dad used to tease my mother and used to tell me about having to wait on a woman.”

Suddenly, things weren’t so funny anymore. Jason wrapped his arms around Dick even tighter, swallowing hard. “I’m sorry, Dickie-bird. I’m so sorry.”

Dick tilted his head up and offered his man a soft smile, hand caressing his face. “Little Wing, you didn’t know. It’s not a big deal.”

A snarl ripped from Jason’s throat. “It is a big deal! Your parents had expectations for you, a plan! They wanted you to grow up, be successful, wait on a woman and be with her. Hell, Bruce even wanted that for you! Now look where you are. I…” he cut off, practically gulping air before continuing in a soft voice. “I’m in the way. I’m ruining their expectations of you.”

Nightwing’s head shot up immediately at the wavering in Jason’s voice, his eyes gazing up into his lover’s that were threatening to overflow. “Jay, what in the world are you going on about? You’re not in the way or ruining expectations. Why would you ever think that?”

The arm around Dick’s torso was now shielding Jason’s eyes. “Think about it, Dickface. He told you about having to wait on a woman. In case you haven’t noticed, I have two balls, not two boobs. I’ve hurt you time and time again. You have scars and bruises because of me. I’m fucked up, and you know misery loves company.”

Dick shook his head before straddling Jason’s thighs, scooting his way up to peel Jason’s shielding appendage away. “Is that what this is about? Because you’re not a woman? Jay, my parents loved me for who I was. We lived with people who walked around in spandex all freaking day. I mean, come on. If that doesn’t scream gay, I don’t know what does.” Jason still didn’t crack a smile, so Dick kept going. “If this is about your past, Little Wing, I’m over it. You have scars and bruises from me, too. I threw you in Arkham, remember that fiasco? I love you. I will wait on you just like waiting on a woman, even though I’m the more effeminate one when it comes to primping and stuff like that. Love, please calm down, okay? I love you. You’re not bringing me down. If anything, you’re taking me higher. Will you please relax…for me?”

Jason merely nodded, assuming the position for Dick to lay back on him, which he did. Dick’s fingers went back to tracing random patterns on his pectorals. “Now, tell me what your favorite country song is?”

“What makes you think I listen to country?”

“I found a Reba McEntire CD in your car.”

“Son of a bitch,” Jason grumbled. “Fine. If you must know…it’s ‘I’m A Survivor’ by her.”

It was Dick’s turn to get choked up. That one word triggered a sudden flood of emotions: “survivor.” His lithe arms shot around Jason, pressing the younger man’s body towards his. “I fell into a deep depression when I found you died. I remember that day so clearly too, reading it on Bruce’s stupid monitor. Why couldn’t the bastard tell me himself? I thought that there had been a mistake. There had to have been. You had so much fire, so much potential. How could that have been thrown away in an instant? Not only that, but you bastard. I started to have fucking feelings for you. Sure, you were younger than I was, you still are. I just wanted to always be around you, watch you, take care of you. Suddenly, that all vanished. I drowned in depression by day and when I wasn’t on patrol with Bruce at night, I searched high and low for your murderer. I came so close to jamming a fucking escrima in his skull, Jay, but I didn’t. I didn’t avenge you, didn’t smite the bastard for the sick psychotic shit he did, because I couldn’t bear the disappointment on Bruce’s face when he found out.”

Jason shook his head, pressing his cheek against Dick’s tresses. “Dick-”

“Let me finish,” he plead. After a few seconds of silence, he continued in a more hushed tone. “When I found out it was you that came back to life, assumed the title of Red Hood? Man, I could have ran marathons. It was a miracle; Jason, my Jason, was back from the dead. But nothing is ever easy for us, is it? Talia threw you in the Lazarus Pit and your head became more screwed up than it was. No matter how much you were trained by the All Caste, League of Assassins, whatever, your head was still scrambled. Still is, a little bit, but you’re getting there. I heard about the incident with Bruce and Joker, and I wondered if you’d blame me for not killing Joker, too. I wouldn’t blame you if you do, because I do every damn day. I thought about the people he’s slaughtered, what he did to Barbara, but most importantly, what he did to you, but I still couldn’t kill the sick fuck, and I hate myself for that. One day, though. One day someone is going to put something through that deranged skull, and I hope and pray with all my god damn heart that I’m the one that gets to do it.”

A couple long moments passed as everything sank in. Jason’s chest shook, and Dick realized it was a chuckle. “What is so funny?”

Jason’s tendrils shook as he fought against the laughter he was suppressing. “Guess you weren’t waiting on a woman, but a survivor instead, huh?”

Dick gazed incredulously into his lover’s face before a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips. Jason wasn’t angry with him, and that was a bit of a relief. He didn’t stop blaming himself, though. But at that moment, nothing really mattered. He had his survivor, his true love. That was all he needed.

The night wore on gradually after that. They laid together for hours discussing favorites and secrets, until eventually their voices wavered from exhaustion. Dick slipped into Dreamland first, and Jason pressed his lips to the sleeping man’s forehead.

“I blame myself more than anyone for my death, the existence of Joker,” he whispered as he stared into the darkness at the ceiling. “I was the dumbass kid who fell into a trap, played his demonic games. As mad as I was at Bruce, in my heart I couldn’t really blame him. I was looking to just lash out, and he was the best option. I didn’t dare come to you, couldn’t. I was terrified I’d push you away more, lose you forever. I couldn’t bear that.”

Tightening his arms around Dick, he spoke again. “Truth is, I don’t have nightmares about my death or clawing my way out like I used to. Your presence saved me from the frequency of those nightmares. Any more, the nightmares I have are of waking up without you beside me, whether it be because I pushed you away or something much worse. I won’t ever make you wait like you did again for me, Dickie, but I would wait for you. I’d wait for you forever and a day, no matter what. I love you so much.”

Jason wasn’t aware of it, but Dick was still awake, and he heard every word. Though his eyes stung with new tears, he kept his breathing steady until he heard a rumble in Jay’s chest from snoring. He smiled softly, brushing the white strands of hair from Jason’s eye and kissing his forehead before laying back down.

“Love you too, Little Wing.”


End file.
